“At first when you acted jealous, honestly I thought you were kidding,”

I couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the question. Or at that the fact I’d asked my ex-boyfriend to answer it. But it’s always in hindsight that you realize how hilarious situations were; how pathetic or dramatic you were being. This was certainly the case for me.

As we know, two’s company, three’s crowd. But when that third is not a human the rule tends not apply. Alas the question was: how did you feel when I got jealous of the cat.

To the unassuming outsider I realize it sounds bonkers – a cat is a cat and not a suitable replacement for a human partner, but sometimes people aren’t rational and judging by the online forums on how to get over pet jealousy I’m not the only one that’s suffered.

Puss was beautiful with the personality everyone wants to be around. Playful eyes and silky black hair, nonchalant but always the centre of attention. She would walk into a room, and immediately people would vie for her attention. At first I was just as locked in.

After feeding her for a while and regular sleepovers we took her to the vet as responsible new owners (we threw a gold coin donation party to raise the funds). She became the forth resident and loved the flat with three other guys, someone always awake to toy with.

But no matter who was there, Zac was always her person of choice. The connection between a person and their pet is strong, I know I have two dogs I’m obsessed with.

She quickly became Zac’s other half. She loved him as much as he loved her and I found myself jostling to be the girl with the most attention, aka an idiot.

“At first when you acted jealous, honestly I thought it you were kidding,” Zac says.

“Once I realized you were for real though it was a trip – the fact you had your own pets that you loved madly made it even more trippy, so I thought you were confusing. I don’t remember seeing you sulky or moody about me with any humans before, so all I could put it down to was that Puss liked me better than you and that was the real issue.”

I was confusing, the fact I was jealous made no sense. Jealous of the time they spent together, of how she could do no wrong in his eyes, jealous of how talented and beautiful he thought she was. And somehow it made me feel inadequate. All I can do now is face palm at the situation.

And it’s true, I was never jealous of other girls being around him because I trusted him, but with Puss I was totally threatened. She didn’t get moody or act irrationally, she didn’t drive him bonkers like I often did, they never fought and were always there for each other.

So I conclude, I was the problem.

I wanted to be the perfect centre of attention. I wanted to so popular that there wasn’t any spare love for a cat – that’s all I can put it down, because nothing else makes sense.

I can tell you hand over heart if you relate to this, we need to stop and maybe try some self love or something, because we’re not about to sprout four legs and fur, and if our boyfriends leave us for their pets it’s not because of their pets, it’s because of us.